When death comes knocking...

I have not lost a husband so I cannot tell you what that pain is like. I have not lost a grown child, so I cannot share that pain with you either. And although I have watched 4 precious grandparents, numerous aunts and uncles and cousins, both my parents, my Father-in-law, and three of our own unborn children die, I cannot share exactly whatever it is you feel. For just as every person is unique, every relationship is unique and therefore every pain of separation is different. My sister- and brother-in-law are going through different kinds of grieving for the untimely accidental death of my niece. They both lost a daughter. They both lost the same daughter. They shared more memories of her than anyone else, but they had different relationships with her and so, of course, are grieving differently.
But for all the differences of people and feelings and memories there is a common thread that we all share when we lose a loved one. A common denominator of pain - deep, throbbing, stabbing pain in our hearts and souls. Through the many funerals where I have stood in line and received hugs and words I could tell you some really dumb things not to say, but I have yet to find the perfect thing to say. Because grief is not shared in words, it's shared in hearts. Grief binds us together because although some grieve deeper and longer and we all grieve differently, the fact remains that we all know that the pain of death is one of the worst pains of all. And somehow the fact that we have others sharing our pain does lighten the load of it a little.
And when we share that pain on our knees with the One who bears all pain of every kind for us, who loves us with a love so great that our aching hearts can never begin to understand it, who carries us in His loving arms and whispers directly into our souls that He is, has been and always will be able to comfort us, our grief is a grief of hope. Of ultimate joy. Of brightness of tomorrow. And that makes an eternity of difference. "Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow, blessings are mine with ten thousand beside. " His faithfulness is truly great. His love and comfort are indescribable, and yet it is unthinkable what grief would be like without Him. Great is thy faithfulness, O God My Father, especially when I am grieving.